From Isolation to Living: What Loneliness Taught Me

Hello everyone! Hope all is well. It’s been a while since I’ve posted a newsletter here, but I’m excited to start sharing again—especially with some astrology updates coming soon, so stay tuned for that!

But before we dive into the stars, I want to share something a bit more personal—something life has been teaching me lately:

Loneliness.

To give you some context, my spiritual awakening began in late 2020. At the time, I found myself stuck in cycles of unfulfilling romantic relationships. I kept attracting partners who, like me, carried deep childhood wounds—except instead of addressing those wounds, they’d suppress everything until it all spilled out in the most vulnerable moments. It mirrored my own struggles, just in a different way.

That period marked the beginning of my healing journey. I started reading, researching, and holding onto hope that I could build a better life. But I was doing it all alone.

Spiritual awakenings are beautiful—but they can also be incredibly lonely.

I’ve always been naturally introverted. The few friendships I had growing up slowly faded away as I evolved. My family was chaotic and fractured. And although I was dating casually, none of it felt rooted or long-term. It was a bittersweet chapter. The loneliness began to weigh on me, even as I tried to “improve” myself. I dealt with weight gain, anxiety, and settling for less than I deserved.

Then I stumbled on a quote that shifted everything:

 “Are you really healing—or are you just isolating yourself?”

That hit me hard.

I realized that, for me, self-isolation had become a form of control. It felt safe. Predictable. But deep down, much of my trauma stemmed from people—from trusted adult figures who let me down, from betrayals in friendships and romantic relationships, from fears that trying something new would only lead to disappointment.

So I stopped trying.

But here’s the thing: healing isn’t meant to be a cage. It's meant to be a bridge—back to life.

Slowly but surely, I started saying yes to things again. I went to events, reconnected with old passions, and began allowing myself to be seen, even when it felt scary. For those who don’t know, I’m currently finishing up my bachelor’s degree in Media Arts and Education. I’ve loved film and TV since I was a kid—it’s where I first learned how stories can make us feel less alone.

And here’s what I’ve come to understand:

Those lonely times taught me that the human experience is meant to be lived. Really lived. And living means trying things—new things, hard things, scary things. Not because there’s a guarantee they’ll work out, but because you’re alive to try.

We’re all going to leave this world someday—morbid as that may sound—and it’s easy to forget how much we’re missing out on when we shrink ourselves. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with enjoying your own company but it’s also good to have a balance in your life. Something for yourself that isn’t completely dependent on another person. 

So here’s your reminder, if you need it: Don’t let fear of pain keep you from the joy of participation. Go to that event. Start that project. Speak up. Be seen. Go on that date. Start that workout. Be heard. Let yourself live.

Thanks for reading. I’ll be back soon with astrology updates—but in the meantime, I’d love to hear what you’ve been learning lately. What has life been teaching you?

With love,

Bianca