Healing sounds like such a serious word. It is commonly tossed around in the spiritual community but it is one of the most practical and simplest things one will ever have to do in life. You can burn all the sage you want. Draw and decorate all the prettiest vision boards. Get all the tarot readings you want but in order to attract complete happiness and abundance. You must have self love and forgiveness for yourself. But healing is much easier said than done and although I’m only 22 years old. I do have a huge testimony to tell with dealing with trauma, heartbreak, betrayal, depression,etc. Through this letter, I hope I can also help guide you guys and let you in on some simple tools that helped me with my healing journey.
Firstly, READ A BOOK ! Okay, not everyone likes to read. But luckily there is audible, and personally these were some great books that helped me along my journey. As humans, we may think a lot of our painful experiences are not shared but you would be surprised. Reading helped to not only open my mind but help train it and shift my perspective about my own pain and how to move forward in life. Here are some amazing books by many people who I look up to and respect
Iyanla Vanzant- In The Meantime
Iyanla Vanzant- Trust
Mark Manson- The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck
Candice Grace Smith- Love I Am
Rupi Kaur- Milk and Honey
Secondly, do NOT run away from your feelings ! In order to truly heal. You must let your heart absolutely break. Many of us think that being vulnerable and opening our hearts is the key to getting hurt and if we feel, it will be too overwhelming. It’s the opposite. This is called shadow work. Be honest with yourself. Who was the first person or experience to trigger a negative feeling in you ? And how do you carry it with you today ? Who can’t you let go of ?
I don’t care if this means you have to cry so hard that you can’t breathe, you have to eat your feelings or stay in bed for a couple of days. Allow your spirit and mind to process these feelings that you haven’t acknowledged. Crying is energy. To heal, you must release those demons. You matter. Your feelings matter. All your experiences who created who you are today matter. This process is not easy and can not be done alone. Therapy is a brilliant source for healing. Financially some people might not have the access so try and turn to a good friend who can listen. Find a mentor. Here are some great apps and one amazing youtube channel to help with this
Betterhelp
TalkSpace
Coach.me
Remente
Youper
Iyanla Vanzant- Youtube Channel
A ritual of forgiveness that an amazing spiritual worker named Candice G Smith has helped me a lot. Simply write down every name or experience that has wounded you in some way. Write a letter to them. And at the end, simply say goodbye and mean it. Imagine a door closing. After either burn the letter or bury it. Go into this with the full intention that you are letting that attachment go. Not just to the person but the feeling of that experience. It’s not easy, I advise you to do this in a series of days or months even depending on your comfortability.
Thirdly, start taking care of YOU ! What is it that you like to do ? What makes you smile ? What are you proud of yourself for ? I mean really what helped me come back to myself when I started healing was learning more about myself. I have many hobbies and enjoy doing many things that don’t really involve other people and external validation. I just do them. Not every hobby has to be turned into a career. Happiness doesn’t always have to be shared. This could be as simple as watching your favorite movie. Taking yourself on a nice walk. Listening to your favorite song. Calling a friend and laughing. Whatever gives you joy. Even if it is just for a slight moment. Follow that feeling. As simple as that is, it is a major key in healing. You don’t need anything else but yourself and your heart. Go with that, day by day. Do something special for you. As long as it is healthy. Be gentle with your inner child. And on the days where you fall back into negative patterns. That is okay also. Our healing is done when we pass on into the spiritual realm. It is why it is called “heal-ing” and not “heal-ed”. It’s a journey but for the better !
I hope these simple three tools helped ! Be sure to contact me for more additional info. Stay blessed everyone.
Sincerely, Bianca
